computer humor

Support: "Type dir, space, a, colon."

Customer: "With a space after 'space'?"

P.S. I got a "A" in computer science (no joke)!

quotes I liked recently, unrelated

psa

i thought this unicef psa was pretty horrifying and then i saw this .. and *then* i watched this.

Happy Thanksgiving!

1. If the presidential candidates are so concerned with how to campaign in Iowa through the holiday season without being too negative, getting on people's nerves and killing the holiday spirit, why don't they do some CHARITY WORK -- and shamelessly make sure it gets press?

2. Do men's bathrooms also have changing tables? If not, I understand that it would be kind of a waste of money, but what are dads supposed to do when they are at In-N-Out with their infants?

3. I heard a funny song on KXCI (local Tucson station) yesterday whose subject matter included hullabaloo and tuberculosis.

4. Neil dreamed about Guantanamo last night.

5. vestiges of Halloween

How to keep the brain kickin'

I found this NYT article to be an interesting report on activities that have been shown to be beneficial to brain function. Now I'd like to see a study on joggers who do sudoku.

12:28 a.m.

I soooooo can't sleep. I think I have to get up at 6. When I was pikku my mother would sing me the Teddy Bear Picnic song. It was entrancing. The undersides of my elbows are scuffy. I am divided as to whether this would self-repair if I stopped resting my elbows on tables, or whether the damage is done. I was in the mood for Neil Young this weekend but I forgot to listen to him. I bet if I pull out a cd tomorrow it will make studying calculus funner.

npd's new favorite

I have to vacuum today, for sure

I just woke up after dreaming of people falling down the stairs, so this NYT article was of especial interest. An excerpt: It is likely during REM, some scientists argue, that the brain proceeds to mix, match and juggle the memory traces it has preserved, looking for hidden connections that help make sense of the world. Life experience is cut up and reordered, sifted and shuffled again. This process could account for the cockeyed, disjointed scenes that occur during dreams: the kaleidoscope of distilled experience is being turned.

Of note in these here parts: Yesterday was really windy. This week the Computer Science Dept. is looking at applications for its office assistant job, of which there are 30+. I had a French midterm yesterday (lundi) and have a csc midterm Friday and a calculus test next week. School is in week 10! But I don't feel exactly employable as a computer scientist. I know I have had only .67 csc classes, but I hope at some point in this program I feel remotely competent.

Neil pointed out that our VHS copy of The Graduate was released in 1985 and bears a recommended retail price of 59.95!!! Does anyone else remember this '80s exorbitance?

I don't like green beans. ... Well I don't.

I haven't yet read this story, but that doesn't mean you can't.

Some of us need to hustle so we can squeal into swallow group at the designated time of 7:30. If I was ever on time for swallow group I feel like I should get a bonus. Or at least a homemade cookie. But probably my self-pride in being punctual would carry the exact same annoyance value to my coworkers as my being 5 minutes late. Alors, no cookie! I have to work Sat. and Sun. but I have a date with Neil tomorrow! Yipee! And he has 2 new UA applications pending. One potentially involves handling blood ... in the name of scientific research ... it sounds tres interestiing.

And also: I got an A on my calculus test! Which I still am in shock over! OK, now I really have to go, even though I would like to sit here for at least 30 more minutes. I don't even know what's happening in the news. I think employment is designed to keep people ignorant of what goes on! Except maybe Dennis and Neil.

The Sky Harbor Back Story

Carol Gotbaum's history

Husband had bad feeling

So ... what kind of legal recourse, if any, would you pursue? Of course, A. by consuming alcohol, which she already knew negatively influenced her mood and behaviors, Gotbaum herself was an agent. ALTHOUGH she apparently was addicted (and therefore the level of personal responsibility involved in picking up a shot glass may be somewhat tempered) and was flying to Tucson specifically to find help. And B. by knowing of these tendencies, her family perhaps could be considered mildly negligent in not appointing a responsible party to fly and make the change with her (although someone was supposed to meet her at Sky Harbor and do just that). That said, what would you do? P.S. I would like to take the credit, on behalf of all women, for NOT printing "hysterical" in a hed on the story in last Sunday's paper. Someone else wrote it and I spoke up. Perhaps they were unclear on the etymology.

calculus on the brain

It is 11:55 p.m. I have given up on trying to figure out why the Java String length() method won't count spaces, and why the indexOf() method won't look at spaces, and why the charAt() method won't recognize spaces. It's really not that hard, which is why I've spent hours trying to find the solution. It's so simple. I just don't know it. Maybe if I looked in my book ... Plan B, which I'll tackle tomorrow.

And speaking of calculus, when I find the derivative of the derivative of a polynomial function, how am I supposed to know the values of x for which the function is positive and concave up? Or is the function supposed to be positive and concave up, since the 2nd derivative isn't even mentioned in the problem ... but why would we even talk about concavity were we not referring to f''x?

And on French ... Good vocab scores. Good effort. Every class I pray that she will not tell me to present a French article in 2-5 days. And that's all I have to say.

Greer is so cool and nice. We walked by the Little Colorado and looked for fishes. We rested and read a lot.

Neil is good. He makes me dinner and cleans the house and asks me how my day was. OK I have to go to bed.

oprah contingency?

Does anyone think Oprah Winfrey would have a fighting chance if she ran for president? Because she is soooooooo popular. ... I just wonder. P.S. No relation to the picture.

fun

It would be neat to backpack through Europe. Has anyone done it?

hibachi, starbury, etc.

exhibit A for why arizona deserves to be the 25th best school in the country (2 ahead of harvard). also, gilbert comments on crazy steph doing an interview. i have linked. you need to watch the whole thing.

such as and

posters for pleasure

.. great movie art featuring paul tebo dead ringer klaus kinski

physical science

1. This article is interesting, and it makes me think of potential research in sensory integration techniques in the autism population. I hope researchers perhaps can get beyond the stick and hammer -- how about a feather and birthday cake!

2. I will post pictures of painted furniture soon.

3. I study calculus every night! College is so fun! The third time around is always the best!

4. The Star published this article Sunday about the possibility of troops in Iraq being exposed to toxic substances and consequently developing cancer. The information is gripping and I want to see tons of research and perhaps lawsuits. Tons.

from a to b

lone star spoiler starting at 6:30

summer hit

no-work weekend!

David Bromstad is so cute. I painted several pieces of furniture. It was fun. Various species of bug tried to eat me alive. Were they attracted to the latex paint or what? OMG, Ali G as Borat is sooooooooooooo not funny. Tomorrow I would like to eat popcorn. And probably paint more furniture. Is anyone else ever plagued by thoughts of what you're not doing, even as you're doing something else? Like, I was reading an article in the New Yorker and simultaneously thinking about the articles in the new New Yorker that I hadn't read. Robert Wright doesn't know who "Jess and Nick" are. I am soooooooooooo scared about starting school. On so many levels. The t-mobile commercial is funny! Dad: So, there's 5 of us and we can each put 5 people on myfaves, so that's 26! Child: No, that's 25. Other child: Yeah, 5x5=25. Dad: No ... no. 26. Carry the nine. (Leaves room) Mom: That's why you need to stay in school, kids.

blink

I just started working part-time at a SNF (skilled-nursing facility, AKA nursing home; pronounced "sniff"). It is very, very amusing.

Neil (of the famous grilled cheese) is still mending from Friday's oral surgery. We are hoping that his pain lifts today, since the doctor gave him a new medicine yesterday. (Is it "topical" if it's in the mouth? Probably not. But "oral" suggests swallowing ... "gummal?" Further research obviously is needed.)

I feel apprehensive and excited about school starting in 19 days. And mostly apprehensive about whether or not I'm going to get a campus parking permit. Neil has 4 job applications pending on campus, all of which look promising.

Yesterday I was thinking about how I probably will never think about this moment again, and therefore why not spend it doing something nice and worthwhile? I spend countless minutes each day thinking about time and money and scheduling (e.g., "When I get paid for this in two weeks, should I put the money into savings or pay some bills in advance ... or both ...?"), and it's ostensibly to help myself in the future when I need to actually make those decisions (e.g., when I get paid). But give me a break, how long does it take to transfer money upon getting paid, it's not like I need to formulate a 5-step plan 100 times over in advance. And further, it's not like I'll get paid and reflect back positively upon the countless minutes spent in "busy work." So. Right now is it. It is here and will never be again. Ever. Let's see how long I can carry that through the day!

Interesting: Who's minding the mind?

Eye candy (on paper): blueprint

abject longing

Will somebody please visit and make a quilt with me? It's too hard to do on my own. The thingy that is supposed to hold the spool broke off (it's plastic; I mean, come on) and my attempts to super-glue it back on only resulted in permanently securing the handle in the "down" position. Anyway, I wound a bobbin myself, because it fits on a different thingy, but I don't think I wound it right because I can't maintain a stitch line. So ... I would be grateful if someone would help me. I would make chocolate chip cookies. And Neil maybe would make his famous grilled cheese.

breaking news

Now when I elect to eat only Godiva dark, I will know that I am taking a stand in the name of chocolate.

movie weekend

In sum:

Evan Almighty is a good choice for members the 5-and-under set who have had a lobotomy.*

Shrek the Third is a good choice for members of the 4-and-under set who have had a lobotomy.

The Naked City is a good choice for persons over 5, without a lobotomy, who recently saw the aforementioned movies back-to-back and wish to resuscitate the resultingly comatose brain cells.

*Sweet Fancy Moses, I can't believe the starrage Evan Almighty got on imdb.

All we got was a frying pan

It would be so fun to think of ads like this, although I think it was pro bono, so it wouldn't pay the rent.

Science Wednesday

Goodbye, Mr. Wizard

small world

I really want to get lost.

and also.

recycled

I posted this on Emily's comment but I find it so funny that I want to post it again! click here (revised)

weird states

we did laundry in lambertville, pa a week ago. except the thing is i just now realized we were actually in lambertville, NEW JERSEY! there is no lambertville in the commonwealth of pennsylvania.

I heart science

Trippy.

project implicit

(and your chicks for free)

Has anyone ever noticed Sting helping out on Dire Straits' "Money for Nothing"?

Has anyone ever noticed that it is essentially the same song as "Don't Stand So Close to Me"?

I guess Sting knew he was riffing his own melody, but still.

Has anyone who has Safari ever noticed a memory glitch? E.g., every time I want to post on this blog (or check my bank acct or do anything else that needs a password) I have to type in my name and password, even though I repeatedly check the "remember me" box and my Safari:preferences is set up to remember things. And accept all cookies. And I don't delete the cookies in between.

We are going on vacation on Friday. The sky is graypurplepink and probably will emit rain. It's windy.

Observation: In 'n' Out on Saturday is heaven. In 'n' Out on Saturday and Sunday is barf-o-rama. Thanks.

Periodontics

Has anyone ever had it done? I'm totally not going to post a picture.

Cold of a sudden!

The weather outside went from 76 deg. to 56 deg. with 23 mph winds that are 46 deg., all in the span of my 60 min. yoga class! Those wanton winds. They are simultaneously playful and mysterious. 46 degrees??

My sunburn is peeling. Can anyone sympathize with the trying-on-bathing-suits plight? I went to Dillard's today with my friend who has been working out steadily since -- oh, I don't know, last April? And in clothes we both look pretty good and healthy and stuff. And in bathing suits, she looks like she should be a bathing suit model. I look ... dimpled. Dimpled with a farmer tan. But I've got a month or two till summer, right? Standing in Dillard's waiting for my friend to get dressed, I had to give myself the You-Are-in-Control-of-Your-Own-Life-Stop-Acting-Like-a-Wuss/Victim speech, but it worked and after I got some suits at Old Navy (seeing my body, of course, as a vessel of pure potential) I happily went to yoga. For the second time in ... 3 months. But also the second time in 4 days. So that's something.

I think the idea of a peace march is interesting. Not to Washington. Not to make a political point about war or greenhouse gas. But to walk together in peace. And spread the message of peace. Kind of like Hands Across America and related movements in the '80s that focused on people all being linked together in the human race (although those movements also were related to international aid). Maybe people could take pledges on how far they could walk, and all the money would go to Sudan or something. But maybe in walking en masse, people would make the point that peace is simple and important. Maybe the peace marchers could travel through every state and spread peace.

We went hiking

I have a sunburn. We went to Seven Falls. Neil said six grandmas on the hike asked him if he was for sale. Happy Easter.

Saturday

Note to self: Using "SPF 5" sunscreen is kind of like smoking "low-tar" cigarettes.

The weather today was idyllic. My friend's boyfriend had a birthday party in the park and his friend from a long time ago visited from New Orleans, wearing '80s wristbands. He staged his entrance by "accidentally" tossing a frisbee into our area. The frisbee hit a baby stroller, but the baby was with her mother.

The flower shop 60 seconds away from our house (on foot) has gerber daisies.

In December, we went hiking with Brian and our friend Andrew (who I hope is having a good time in Texas). It was freezing but really fun.

Oh -- OH! The big news is that I learned how to thread a bobbin. With no small amount of help from Amye! So far since yesterday I've made 7 pillow cases. Maybe tomorrow ... applique???

March fantasy

Sometimes I dream about going to Hawaii. I could probably go there as an SLP traveller. Sometimes it's scary to think about picking up and moving. Although the extremely, extremely loud party directly outside our bedroom window last night from midnight till forever made it a tad easier to fantasize about living elsewhere.

Sometimes I dream about making a quilt. About being so adept at making a quilt that I can go to the fabric store and pick out mouthwatering colors/patterns and go home and make a quilt. Piece of cake.

Sometimes I dream about being tan and warm in Puerto Penasco and running on the beach and playing Scrabble by sunlight with my best friend and playing with kids and floating.

Today I didn't make it to the boot camp class because I woke up too late because certain parties were screaming flirtatious obscenities through the window into my ear between swigs of cheap beer all night, but I went to the gym anyway and discovered a new setting on the elliptical machine that was very, very hard and therefore fun. I listened to the Talking Heads and Snoop Dogg feat. Pharrell, which helped.

It's not rocket science, people

Just in case anyone hasn't read this recent McCain exchange.

Food for thought

Blue Cross Blue Shield of Alabama (my health insurer) does not cover oral contraceptives for the purpose of birth control.

But it covers Viagra.

I think I'm getting an inkling of what life was like before women's lib.

I may go on strike.

Life before plastic??? What??!!!

Have you ever wondered how babies drank milk and juice before the advent of modern-day bottles*?

Of course you have. This picture is an example of a terra-cotta baby bottle from 450 b.c. Parents of ancient Greece served a mixture of wine and honey from this hanging shrew-shaped vessel.

Romans figured out how to blow clear glass around the beginning of the first millennium, A.D., but glass went out of style and didn't regain popularity until the 20th century.

During the 13th through 16th centuries (and possibly others), it was common throughout Europe for babies to be fed from cow horns to which nipples (made from cloth-filled leather or dried cow teats) were affixed.

Around the end of the 16th century, Germany and Italy started using bottles of wood or leather, which quickly were replaced in favor of pewter. Why would anyone want to drink out of metal? Ew.

Banjo-shaped glass bottles were pretty popular at the end of the 19th century, but they were impossible to keep clean and posed grave hygiene risks.

Emerging around the same period, banana bottles saved the day with their easy-to-clean design.

In the early 20th century the upright bottle came into style, but it was narrow-necked and far more difficult to clean than the banana. The neck was later widened, retaining the pull-over nipple feature.

And then plastic and screw-on tops were invented!

Believe me, the information I have just related is a mere gloss of the bottle information available out there. I love when all the headlines get writ and I have a little time on the computer to explore important subjects.

* Relatedly, please consult these stories for important information about modern baby bottles, drink containers, dental sealants, cans, and various other common, hard plastic apparati.

My eyes itch

We organized every single shred of paperwork in our house into, like, 40 files. Divided into two folders: current and archives/non-changing stuff. Alphabetized.

We have a budget. (Translation: I have a budget. Neil doesn't spend money with near as much abandon.) And so far, 6/7 into Week One, I've kept it with no problemo. It is probably the 20th budget I've ever tried and the first that I've had any success with whatsoever.

I don't buy lunch anymore, except maybe on Fridays.

My favorite stores are Old Navy and Target.

I feel good and centered this week, and it may be related to the above points. If the good/centeredness holds for another week or so, I think it can serve as substantive scientific data.

I want to see the waxed body exhibit that runs through May in Phx.

Late.

I'm kind of hungry

New haircut:

But more importantly, today I was leaving the supermarket and much to my delight three 10-year-olds called out, "Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?"

"YEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I tried not to look like too much of a maniacal freak. "Why, yes, girls ... What kinds do you have?" I wanted to sit down with them and relate my misery in not having got ANY Girl Scout cookie solicitations the whole season. I wanted to tell them about how I was convinced that the GSC moment had been lost forever and I would NEVER get to savor the beloved Samoas or crisp Thin Mints that haunted my dreams. And how my faith in GSCs was now, against all odds, redeemed by their simple offering.

Time is money and they had a lot of boxes to sell, so I skipped the confessional and bought three boxes. Which hopefully will last 24 hours.

In other news, it's finally warm! 86 today and I'm not looking back. I might ask for the day after my birthday off. I might sign up for classes in the fall and do my job per-diem. Voice lessons are going really well. Neil is working super hard, at work and home. He got free peppercorns at work today.

I dare the sun to shine tomorrow

Ode to Sadness by Pablo Neruda

Sadness, scarab
with seven crippled feet,
spiderweb egg,
scramble-brained rat,
bitch's skeleton:
No entry here.
Don't come in.
Go away.
Go back
south with your umbrella,
go back
north with your serpent's teeth.
A poet lives here.
No sadness may
cross this threshold.
Through these windows
comes the breath of the world,
fresh red roses,
flags embroidered with
the victories of the people.
No.
No entry.
Flap
your bat's wings,
I will trample the feathers
that fall from your mantle,
I will sweep the bits and pieces
of your carcass to
the four corners of the wind,
I will wring your neck,
I will stitch your eyelids shut,
I will sew your shroud,
sadness, and bury your rodent bones
beneath the springtime of an apple tree.

But I am not sad. I really want to read "I Am a Strange Loop". I like my haircut. I swear to God, I am sick of being cold. I HATE IT!!! But I'm in luck, because spring approacheth. There's a new bakery on University from which I got walnut bread and it is good. The bakery and the walnut bread both. Has anyone ever used an exercise ball, those big ones people sit on and stretch out on? I used one for the first time yesterday and I think a large part of the week will be spent in recovery. Wild!

on my mind/nice haircut