abject longing

Will somebody please visit and make a quilt with me? It's too hard to do on my own. The thingy that is supposed to hold the spool broke off (it's plastic; I mean, come on) and my attempts to super-glue it back on only resulted in permanently securing the handle in the "down" position. Anyway, I wound a bobbin myself, because it fits on a different thingy, but I don't think I wound it right because I can't maintain a stitch line. So ... I would be grateful if someone would help me. I would make chocolate chip cookies. And Neil maybe would make his famous grilled cheese.

breaking news

Now when I elect to eat only Godiva dark, I will know that I am taking a stand in the name of chocolate.

movie weekend

In sum:

Evan Almighty is a good choice for members the 5-and-under set who have had a lobotomy.*

Shrek the Third is a good choice for members of the 4-and-under set who have had a lobotomy.

The Naked City is a good choice for persons over 5, without a lobotomy, who recently saw the aforementioned movies back-to-back and wish to resuscitate the resultingly comatose brain cells.

*Sweet Fancy Moses, I can't believe the starrage Evan Almighty got on imdb.

All we got was a frying pan

It would be so fun to think of ads like this, although I think it was pro bono, so it wouldn't pay the rent.

Science Wednesday

Goodbye, Mr. Wizard

small world

I really want to get lost.

and also.

recycled

I posted this on Emily's comment but I find it so funny that I want to post it again! click here (revised)

weird states

we did laundry in lambertville, pa a week ago. except the thing is i just now realized we were actually in lambertville, NEW JERSEY! there is no lambertville in the commonwealth of pennsylvania.

I heart science

Trippy.

project implicit

(and your chicks for free)

Has anyone ever noticed Sting helping out on Dire Straits' "Money for Nothing"?

Has anyone ever noticed that it is essentially the same song as "Don't Stand So Close to Me"?

I guess Sting knew he was riffing his own melody, but still.

Has anyone who has Safari ever noticed a memory glitch? E.g., every time I want to post on this blog (or check my bank acct or do anything else that needs a password) I have to type in my name and password, even though I repeatedly check the "remember me" box and my Safari:preferences is set up to remember things. And accept all cookies. And I don't delete the cookies in between.

We are going on vacation on Friday. The sky is graypurplepink and probably will emit rain. It's windy.

Observation: In 'n' Out on Saturday is heaven. In 'n' Out on Saturday and Sunday is barf-o-rama. Thanks.

Periodontics

Has anyone ever had it done? I'm totally not going to post a picture.

Cold of a sudden!

The weather outside went from 76 deg. to 56 deg. with 23 mph winds that are 46 deg., all in the span of my 60 min. yoga class! Those wanton winds. They are simultaneously playful and mysterious. 46 degrees??

My sunburn is peeling. Can anyone sympathize with the trying-on-bathing-suits plight? I went to Dillard's today with my friend who has been working out steadily since -- oh, I don't know, last April? And in clothes we both look pretty good and healthy and stuff. And in bathing suits, she looks like she should be a bathing suit model. I look ... dimpled. Dimpled with a farmer tan. But I've got a month or two till summer, right? Standing in Dillard's waiting for my friend to get dressed, I had to give myself the You-Are-in-Control-of-Your-Own-Life-Stop-Acting-Like-a-Wuss/Victim speech, but it worked and after I got some suits at Old Navy (seeing my body, of course, as a vessel of pure potential) I happily went to yoga. For the second time in ... 3 months. But also the second time in 4 days. So that's something.

I think the idea of a peace march is interesting. Not to Washington. Not to make a political point about war or greenhouse gas. But to walk together in peace. And spread the message of peace. Kind of like Hands Across America and related movements in the '80s that focused on people all being linked together in the human race (although those movements also were related to international aid). Maybe people could take pledges on how far they could walk, and all the money would go to Sudan or something. But maybe in walking en masse, people would make the point that peace is simple and important. Maybe the peace marchers could travel through every state and spread peace.

We went hiking

I have a sunburn. We went to Seven Falls. Neil said six grandmas on the hike asked him if he was for sale. Happy Easter.

Saturday

Note to self: Using "SPF 5" sunscreen is kind of like smoking "low-tar" cigarettes.

The weather today was idyllic. My friend's boyfriend had a birthday party in the park and his friend from a long time ago visited from New Orleans, wearing '80s wristbands. He staged his entrance by "accidentally" tossing a frisbee into our area. The frisbee hit a baby stroller, but the baby was with her mother.

The flower shop 60 seconds away from our house (on foot) has gerber daisies.

In December, we went hiking with Brian and our friend Andrew (who I hope is having a good time in Texas). It was freezing but really fun.

Oh -- OH! The big news is that I learned how to thread a bobbin. With no small amount of help from Amye! So far since yesterday I've made 7 pillow cases. Maybe tomorrow ... applique???

March fantasy

Sometimes I dream about going to Hawaii. I could probably go there as an SLP traveller. Sometimes it's scary to think about picking up and moving. Although the extremely, extremely loud party directly outside our bedroom window last night from midnight till forever made it a tad easier to fantasize about living elsewhere.

Sometimes I dream about making a quilt. About being so adept at making a quilt that I can go to the fabric store and pick out mouthwatering colors/patterns and go home and make a quilt. Piece of cake.

Sometimes I dream about being tan and warm in Puerto Penasco and running on the beach and playing Scrabble by sunlight with my best friend and playing with kids and floating.

Today I didn't make it to the boot camp class because I woke up too late because certain parties were screaming flirtatious obscenities through the window into my ear between swigs of cheap beer all night, but I went to the gym anyway and discovered a new setting on the elliptical machine that was very, very hard and therefore fun. I listened to the Talking Heads and Snoop Dogg feat. Pharrell, which helped.

It's not rocket science, people

Just in case anyone hasn't read this recent McCain exchange.

Food for thought

Blue Cross Blue Shield of Alabama (my health insurer) does not cover oral contraceptives for the purpose of birth control.

But it covers Viagra.

I think I'm getting an inkling of what life was like before women's lib.

I may go on strike.

Life before plastic??? What??!!!

Have you ever wondered how babies drank milk and juice before the advent of modern-day bottles*?

Of course you have. This picture is an example of a terra-cotta baby bottle from 450 b.c. Parents of ancient Greece served a mixture of wine and honey from this hanging shrew-shaped vessel.

Romans figured out how to blow clear glass around the beginning of the first millennium, A.D., but glass went out of style and didn't regain popularity until the 20th century.

During the 13th through 16th centuries (and possibly others), it was common throughout Europe for babies to be fed from cow horns to which nipples (made from cloth-filled leather or dried cow teats) were affixed.

Around the end of the 16th century, Germany and Italy started using bottles of wood or leather, which quickly were replaced in favor of pewter. Why would anyone want to drink out of metal? Ew.

Banjo-shaped glass bottles were pretty popular at the end of the 19th century, but they were impossible to keep clean and posed grave hygiene risks.

Emerging around the same period, banana bottles saved the day with their easy-to-clean design.

In the early 20th century the upright bottle came into style, but it was narrow-necked and far more difficult to clean than the banana. The neck was later widened, retaining the pull-over nipple feature.

And then plastic and screw-on tops were invented!

Believe me, the information I have just related is a mere gloss of the bottle information available out there. I love when all the headlines get writ and I have a little time on the computer to explore important subjects.

* Relatedly, please consult these stories for important information about modern baby bottles, drink containers, dental sealants, cans, and various other common, hard plastic apparati.

My eyes itch

We organized every single shred of paperwork in our house into, like, 40 files. Divided into two folders: current and archives/non-changing stuff. Alphabetized.

We have a budget. (Translation: I have a budget. Neil doesn't spend money with near as much abandon.) And so far, 6/7 into Week One, I've kept it with no problemo. It is probably the 20th budget I've ever tried and the first that I've had any success with whatsoever.

I don't buy lunch anymore, except maybe on Fridays.

My favorite stores are Old Navy and Target.

I feel good and centered this week, and it may be related to the above points. If the good/centeredness holds for another week or so, I think it can serve as substantive scientific data.

I want to see the waxed body exhibit that runs through May in Phx.

Late.

I'm kind of hungry

New haircut:

But more importantly, today I was leaving the supermarket and much to my delight three 10-year-olds called out, "Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?"

"YEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I tried not to look like too much of a maniacal freak. "Why, yes, girls ... What kinds do you have?" I wanted to sit down with them and relate my misery in not having got ANY Girl Scout cookie solicitations the whole season. I wanted to tell them about how I was convinced that the GSC moment had been lost forever and I would NEVER get to savor the beloved Samoas or crisp Thin Mints that haunted my dreams. And how my faith in GSCs was now, against all odds, redeemed by their simple offering.

Time is money and they had a lot of boxes to sell, so I skipped the confessional and bought three boxes. Which hopefully will last 24 hours.

In other news, it's finally warm! 86 today and I'm not looking back. I might ask for the day after my birthday off. I might sign up for classes in the fall and do my job per-diem. Voice lessons are going really well. Neil is working super hard, at work and home. He got free peppercorns at work today.